Jerry Lawler Quotes

* Danke an Rob und Justin von WRESTLINGNATION.COM *

 

Vince McMahon: Mabel is a real nice guy to the fans.

Jerry: Yeah, but I heard that he is not too nice if you disturb him during feeding time.

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Here was a guest ring announcer.

Guest ring announcer: From New Zealand, at a total combined weight of 40 pounds....

Jerry: Ha! Ha! Ha! Did you hear that McMahon? 40 pounds? He must be getting therr weight confused with how many sardines they eat a day.

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Vince McMahon: Marty Jannetty, making his return to the WWF and is looking in superb shape.

Jerry: Are you kidding me McMahon, the only thing harded than his knuckles are his arteries.

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Jerry: I just got a note from a doctor saying thst there was a possible trace of blood in Jake "The Snake's" alcohol stream.

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Jerry: You know what you call a pretty girl in texas? A Tourist !

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Jerry: McMahon, I'm so sick so Shawn Michaels kliq, it makes me sick.

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Jerry: A lot of people say that Sid's elevator doesn't go up all the way to the top and that he's three beers short of a six-pack.

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Vince McMahon: You are just saying things so people can see things through your eyes.

Jerry: Oh come on McMahon. Everyone is entitled to MY opinion.

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A fan in the crowd was wearing a red clown wig

Jerry: Is that Barbra Streisand?

Vince McMahon: I think that is Oprah.

Jerry: I saw Barbra Streisand on Oprah today talking about her movie, it was about as exciting as watching paint dry.

Vince McMahon: Barbra Streisand has got a new movie comming out.

Jerry: Barbra Streisand's new movie is called "A Mirror with Two Faces"

Vince McMahon: I think?

Jerry: HA!, Barbra Streisand's mirrors needs two faces. Every time she looks in the mirror her reflection throws-up.

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Todd Pettengill: Welcome to the Milton Bradley Karate Fighters Holiday Tournament. This week it is, well it's Beauty and the Beast when Sable takes on Dok Hendrix.

Jerry: Yeah, Sable sure is a beast and Hendrix is just a bumbling idiot.

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Jerry: Well there is Dok Hendrix doing what he does best, always begging a woman.

Todd Pettengill: Next week, Sable will meet the winner of the Sunny vs. Mr Backlund match, that should be interesting.

Jerry: Why don't you try doing that sometime?

Todd Pettengill: What?

Jerry: Being interesting. ______________________________________________________________________

Shawn Michaels on Regis and Kathy Lee.

Regis: You have a big match this weekend against Sid, what is your strategy?

Shawn Michaels: Run!

Jerry: He finally told the truth. ________________________________________________________________________

Lawler on Bret Hart.

Jerry: He needs to hire Jose Ebear or go to Supercuts to get a haircut.

Look at that nasty hair of his. ________________________________________________________________________

Bret Hart is drinking out a cup while watching a Steve Austin match.

Jerry: It looks like Bret Hart has been hanging around Jake "The Snake" Roberts, looks like he is drinking some of that encouraging liquior for his match.

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Bret Hart whispers something to himself.

Jerry: I can read lips, he said to make sure the door is locked. ________________________________________________________________________

Todd Pettengill: Welcome to the Milton Bradley Karate Fighters Tournament. This week Mr. Perfect battles Phinese I. Godwin.

Jerry: Yeah, he sure is a pig.

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The Bulldog about to execute a elbow drop on Razor Ramon.

Jerry: If the Bulldog connects with this, there'll be a grease spot on the mat even Pine Sol can't take out.

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Jerry: Hey Ross, I had a nightmare last night, Sunny was my mother and I was a bottle baby. ________________________________________________________________________

Jerry: I'm not saying that Stu Hart is old, but I hear that Anna Nicole Smith is asking him out on a date. ________________________________________________________________________

Lawler on a fan in the crowd.

Jerry: I've heard of faces that could stop clocks, her's could stop all

of Switzerland's.

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Lawler on a fan in the crowd.

Jerry: I saw this guy having a drink in the bathroom before. Then the seat fell down and hit him on the head.

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Shawn Michaels be escorted by an elderly woman.

Jerry: I saw Shawn Michaels being escourted by Mother Teresa. ________________________________________________________________________

Jerry: Hey Shawn Michaels, this is the king. Can you hear me?

Shawn Michaels: I can hear ya King Fish.

Jerry: I have had enough of this meely mouth mush as I can stomach. Jose Lothario, that old fossil sitting next to you, cost you the World Wrestling Federation title by being on the apron. Hey Jose, if your eyesight is that bad, you need to get your bifocals checked. ________________________________________________________________________

Sunny is comming down the aisle to commentate.

Vince McMahon: Comming up next, Rocky Maivia, the first ever third generation superstar in the back warming up. Oh My goodness!!

Jerry: Yeah McMahon, calm down. It looks like your warming up.

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Jerry: C'mon McMahon. That is about as belevable as O.J. Simpson on the witness stand.

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Sunny sits next to Vince McMahon

Jerry: Watch your hands McMahon. ________________________________________________________________________

Sunny doing color on Rocky Maivia's match.

Jerry: Hey Sunny, if you're so interested in genes, I have a pair of Levis. ________________________________________________________________________

Jerry: If any of you people are going shopping this Christmas, I think you should get what Rocky Maivia has... a Chia Head. ________________________________________________________________________

Rocky Maivia does a reversal on an opponent.

Jerry: Good job pineapple head. ________________________________________________________________________

A boy is going crazy when Sable comes down.

Jerry: Look at him, he is about to have a stroke. ________________________________________________________________________

Mankind has an axe.

Jerry: Hey Mankind, bring that axe over hear. I think McMahon needs a haircut. ________________________________________________________________________

Vince McMahon: And there is a look at Sable who gets more beautiful by the day.

Jerry: Clean your glasses.

Vince McMahon: What?

Jerry: I said clean your glasses McMahon.

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Jerry Lawler and HHH on Sable.

Jerry: Doesn't she still have one of your cars?

HHH: Yes, I believe she does.

Jerry: I heard she kept the BMW because it is the only one she can spell.

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Jerry: Look at Jake, he looks like he's drunk!

Vince McMahon: Jake "The Snake" Roberts, where did he come from?

Jerry: The Bar! Where else?

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Shawn Micheals said "I have to do what I have to do."

Jerry: Frank Sanatra did what he had to do, and now he is a wrinkled-upold prune.

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Vince McMahon: Later tonight on RAW, Shawn Michaels is in the WWF studios withan apology.

Jerry: He will probably apologize for that hair cut.

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Jerry: Beavis & Butthead are doing America is like Jim Ross and James E. Cornette doing Sunday morning Superstars.

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Jerry: I'm glad you got Shawn Michaels off the camera so that his nose wouldn't grow like Pinnocio.

Vince McMahon: Stop It!

Jerry: C'mon McMahon. That apology was about as sincere as Sable's hair color.

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Jerry: Jake brings that big, ugly, slimmy, 15 foot long reptile as a tag team partner.

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Jerry: I heard that scientist found evidence of prehistoric life on Mars and that Stu & Helen Hart are the founding parents.

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Jake Roberts was flat on his back in the ring.

Jerry: Five million people are watching RAW and Jake is not one of them.

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Jerry: I heard that Stu & Helen Hart use to be nudists, until they got kicked out of the Garden of Eden.

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Phineus is being Jacknifed...

Jim Ross: That is 330 pounds...

Jerry: ...Of Pork!

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Jerry: I don't mind the funk-ets, but I can care less for Flash Funk.

He reminds me of the Christmas season, loud and useless.

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Jerry: You and Goldust probably shop at the same place.

Vince McMahon: Where is that?

Jerry: Toupee's R' Us! HA! HA! HA! HA!

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Jerry: Hey McMahon, I bought you a new toupee for Chirstmas, but my

Cabbage Patch Snack time doll ate it.

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Jerry: I would like to here Ahmed Johnson say Mother Smucker three times fast.

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Jerry: Bret Hart's boots are uglier than O.J. Simpson's Bruno Maglias.

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Shawn Michaels is schedualed to do color commentary.

Jerry: I hope Jose Lotherio doesn't come down with him.

Vince McMahon: I sincerely hope so.

Jerry: His veins are still clogged with fried beans, tacos...

Vince McMahon: Alright, Stop It!

Jerry: ...burritos, and salsa! I heard that when he took an X-Ray ofhis heart, a big jalapena was clogging it.

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About the instant replay rule.

Jerry: I guarantee you when you were born and your parents looked at you...

Jim Ross: Alright!

Jerry: ...they knew they made a mistake, but they didn't get rid ofyou.

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Goldust started to unzipr his clothes.

Jerry: What is Goldust trying to do, show off the one chest hair that he has.

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Jerry: Jose Lotherio gets winded just by dialing long-distance.

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Vince said Shawn Michaels and Jose Lothario have a father son relationship.

Jerry: It is more like a grandfather-son relationship.

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Jerry: Here comes "Stone Cold" Steve Austin. Here is a guy who parks in handicap spaces.

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Jim Ross: King, I don't know why you constantly verbally abuse a man like Jake "The Snake" Roberts. Jake Roberts has had to battle a lot of demons in his lifetime.

Jerry: Yeah, he also drank most of them.

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Jerry: Can someone please tell the woman with the 7 kids to go next door and get them, they are beating the BOMBERS 23-0.

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Vince McMahon: What do you think about Hunter's shonze ?

Jerry: Did you hear him, he wants to know what you think about Hunter's nose?

The Girl: It's okay.

Jerry: Let me ask you this, what do you think about McMahon's toupee? ________________________________________________________________________

Lawler on Ahmed in the hospital.

Jerry: He has spent more times in a hospital than Nurse Gunbody lately.

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Bret Hart is commenting on Shawn Michaels.

Bret Hart: There are two things that really annoy me about you Michaels.

Jerry: There are a lot of things that annoy me about you Bret.

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Jerry Lawler: What is Sunny going to do Ross, be the guest ring announcer?

Jim Ross: Time keeper, King.

Jerry Lawler: Oh she can keep time with me anytime. Don't waist your time with that idiot Rocky Maivia.

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Jerry Lawler: I see Sunny in my dreams every night. She'll probably see you, Jim Ross in her dreams, if she eats too much.

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Jerry Lawler: The Manhattan Center is where I first confronted Stu and Helen Hart. The couple that produced more tragedies than Shakespeare.

Jim Ross: That is also where you had a confrontation with Tiny Tim.

Jerry uses Undertaker's voice.

Jerry Lawler: Yeah, May he Rest In Peace. Ha! Ha! Ha!

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Jerry Lawler: Who can't get distracted seeing a big yellow freak out at ringside.

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Jerry on ECW.

Jerry Lawler: Why don't you bring your thugs & has-beens to the Manhattan Center, which is an arena and not a bingo hall where you guys wrestle in.

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Jerry Lawler: No wonder why Jim Cornette kept Yokozuna silent all this time, his English is terrible.

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Jerry Lawler: The Honky Tonk Man called Paul Bearer about cremation for Col. Tom Parker. Paul Bearer said, "Do you want extra crispy, or original?"

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Jerry Lawler on Shawn Michaels.

Jerry Lawler: Come on McMahon. If someone kept telling you how charasmatic, how resilient, and how flamleboyante you are, your head would get so big, your toupee wouldn't be able to fit on it.

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Vince McMahon: Look at Phineus & Mankind. Put those two brains together and what do you get?

Jerry Lawler: Close your eyes.

Vince McMahon: Sounds like Stu Hart.

Jerry Lawler: What you see is what you get.

Vince McMahon: Oh no, that sounds scary.

Jerry Lawler: Well I hear that the Godwinns are a little upset I understand because....

Vince McMahon: The Godwinns! Why?

Jerry Lawler: Well...

Vince McMahon: I can understand them being upset having to face Vader and Mankind.

Jerry Lawler: I understand that before the match that Vader might have washed his tights in their slop bucket.

Vince McMahon: What?

Jerry Lawler: And I hear that Mankind may have used the slop to groom his hair.

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Vince McMahon: Mankind is refusing to tag in Vader.

Jerry Lawler: Mankind likes just a little pain.

Vince McMahon: He likes a lot of pain.

Jerry Lawler: I understand when he was a little kid, the other kids in the neighborhood use to trade and collect his teeth. That all started when he got that bad attitude and he still has it.

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Jerry Lawler on Stu Hart.

Jerry Lawler: Why don't you put your teeth in backwards and eat yourself.

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Jerry Lawler: I think Stu and Helen Hart should get an appointment with Isaac Yankem.

Vince McMahon: What for?

Jerry Lawler: So he can put braces on their false teeth!

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Vince McMahon: Phinneus is not exactly the brain of the Godwinn outfit.

Jerry Lawler: Is there a brain in the Godwinn outfit?

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Jerry Lawler on the Godwinns.

Jerry Lawler: If these guys brains were bacon, they would be sizzle-lean.

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Jerry Lawler: It is so cold here in New York that Phineus's tooth was rattling.

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Jerry Lawler: Get these hillbillies out of here, they are starting to smell up the Manhattan Center.

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Phinneus with a sleeper hold.

Jerry Lawler: When Phinneus gets those armpits around your nose, you will go out instantly.

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Godwinns lost to the Blackjacks.

Jerry Lawler: You know what they say in Bitters, Manure happens!

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When the bWo came out on Raw is War.

Jerry Lawler: Look at this McMahon, this is a freak show.

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Jerry Lawler on the bWo

Jerry Lawler: It should just be the BO.

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Da Blue Guy: Hey Burger King man, "Say Hello to Da Blue Guy".

Jerry Lawler: It's more like, "Say hello to the fat guy".

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Paul Heyman: If this WWF thing doesn't work out for you , we can give you a job in ECW.

Vince McMahon: Thank you, I appreciate that.

Jerry Lawler: Yeah, I've seen some of your shows. You need an announcer.

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Jerry Lawler on Big Stevie Cool.

Jerry Lawler: Don't you point your finger at me bean poll.

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Jerry Lawler on Da Blue Guy

Jerry Lawler: How fat is that guy anyway?

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Marlena said she didn't feel too good but she would wrestle anyway.

Jerry Lawler: Let me feel you so I can see.

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Sunny refusing to start the arm wrestling match.

Honky Tonk Man: Come on Sunny, you're already warmed-up.

Jerry Lawler: She's starting to warm me up.

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Jerry Lawler on Tiny Tim

Jerry Lawler: I like the way you always look like an unmade bed.

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Jerry Lawler on Tiny Tim.

Jerry Lawler: So, where did you get that suit from? Did the man at the carnival guess your weight wrong?

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Jerry Lawler on Taz.

Jerry Lawler: This guy is so short, he buys an ant farm for a second house.

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Jerry Lawler on Taz.

Jerry Lawler: I have socks taller than him.

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Taz told Lawler to tell those wise cracks to his face.

Jerry Lawler: Tell him to come down and I will tell him how short he is to his face. If I can bend down that far.

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Jerry Lawler on Taz.

Jerry Lawler: He looks a lot bigger on the Lucky Charms box.

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Vince McMahon: I believe we have Jerry "The King" Lawler on the line. Mr. Lawler, are you there?

Jerry Lawler: Yeah, I'm here McMahon and I can't believe you accepted this collect call. You're so cheap, you wouldn't even tip a canoe.

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Jerry Lawler: The WWF needs ECW like Michael Jordan needs Head & Shoulders.

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The Mexican Wrestlers are in the ring.

Jerry Lawler: Look at Paul E. He needs to wear a mask. He looks like a

bloated-up toe frog.

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Jerry Lawler on ECW.

Jerry Lawler: These guys are on good behavior. Why don't you guys do what you normally do, like light a fan on fire. Or maybe stack about ten tables and throw someone off the balcony.

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Jerry Lawler: Wow, what a pair!

Kevin Kelly: What are you talking about?

Jerry Lawler: I'm talking about Faarooq & Sunny

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Jerry Lawler: McMahon, did you say that Jake "The Snake" called from Atlanta?

Vince McMahon: Yes, why?

Jerry Lawler: Atlanta, why? do they have a drinking contest in the Olympics?

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Jerry Lawler on the Hart Family.

Jerry Lawler: I would love to be at the Hart's on Christmas morning.

Vince McMahon: What for?

Jerry Lawler: So I can be the special guest referee.

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Jerry Lawler: You hit the nail right on the thumb.

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Sunny with the Tag Team Belts.

Jerry Lawler: Hey McMahon, look at those belts.

Vince McMahon: Yeah King, they look nice. Now can you please pay attention to the match.

Jerry Lawler: Come on McMahon. Just because I'm on a diet, doesn't mean I can't look at the menu.

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Jerry Lawler said he was friends with Ken Shamrock. Shamrock said he doesn't know him.

Jerry Lawler: Come on, what's the matter? Have you been bounced around that octagon too much?

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Jerry Lawler: I hope that Hunter finishes off Flash Funk so I don't have to listen to that music when he comes down, and so I don't have to see you dance McMahon.

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Chyna just kicked a wrestler.

Jerry Lawler: The Dallas Cowboys just lost their kicker. From the looks of things, they can sign Chyna.

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Jim Ross states that on the WWF superstar line there is a report of a wrestler who got strip searched.

Jerry Lawler: Hey, was it Sunny?

Vince McMahon: All right, knock it off!

Jim Ross: Well, you're close.

Jerry Lawler: Whoa! I want to get a job at an airport.

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Vince McMahon: How can you not respect Bret Hart?

Jerry Lawler: I don't!

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A crowd of girls were cheering Shawn Michaels.

Jerry Lawler: They got some ugly fans.

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Shawn Michaels: I want to thank the fans...

Jerry Lawler: For What?!

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Shawn Michaels thanks his fans for writing him cards.

Jerry Lawler: I'm surprised your fans can write.

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Shawn Michaels said that he will be at WrestleMania13

Vince McMahon: I look forward to it.

Jerry Lawler: I don't.

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Vince McMahon: Bret Hart has been...

Jerry Lawler: ...Whinning, crying, belly-aching. Now people are starting to see the real Bret Hart.

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Jerry Lawler: Paul Bearer's face is so big, needs a bookmark to find his chin.

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Goldust is squatting.

Jerry Lawler: He looks like he's sitting on his thrown.

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Jerry Lawler: Just because Hunter Hearst Helmsley makes Pinnocio look like a cat, don't make fun of him.

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Jerry Lawler: The only time Vader saw 90210 is when he got on the scale.

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Jerry Lawler: Get some chalk because once this Chicago Street Fight match is over, draw lines will have to be made.

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Jerry Lawler: Hey waiter, come over here. I think Stu Hart just ordered some Jerital on the rocks.

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Jerry Lawler: Helen is wearing some antique jewelry.

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Jerry Lawler: The reason why Helen Hart is not here is because I heard she went shopping at an antique shop, and they decided to keep her.

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Chyna pulled down the rope causing Bart Gunn to fall.

Jim Ross: King, you must have selective vision or something?

Jerry Lawler: I'm so mesmerized by her beautiful face.

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A Mexican Wrestler with a lot of hair coming from his mask.

Jerry Lawler: Is that Venom's real hair, or does he go to the same toupee shop you go to McMahon?

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Jerry Lawler: When someone told the Brooklyn Brawler not to change, he thought they meant his clothes.

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Vince McMahon: Maybe the Hitman will apologize for his action?

Jerry Lawler: Fat Chance!

Bret Hart: First off, I would like to apologize.

Jerry Lawler: What?

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Goldust started to unbutton Paul Bearer's shirt

Jerry Lawler: You better be careful Goldust, a few more chins might pop out.

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Vince McMahon thinks the Hart reunion is despicable.

Jerry Lawler: Shut Up McMahon! This is beautiful.

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Jerry gets a little emotional.

Jerry Lawler: I think I need to be held .

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Jesse James broke the Honky Tonk Man's guitar and Honky got a little upset...

Jerry Lawler: Get him a handkerchief.

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Mankind threw fire into the Undertaker's eyes.

Jim Ross: For as long as you have hated Bret Hart, all of a sudden you're starting to agree with him?

Jerry Lawler: Well, now Bret Hart finally saw the light. Just like The Undertaker, yeah he saw the light all right Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

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WWF's live call in show.

Jerry Lawler: So John, what are you doing up there in Wisconsin, making cheese?

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Mini-Goldust enters.

Jerry Lawler: Now I'm just waiting for a Mini-Marlena to pop up.

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Jerry Lawler: If stupidity was water, Ahmed Johnson would be Niagara Falls.

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Jerry Lawler: Hey Iron Sheik! Tell the Sultan to hit Ahmed Johnson where his kidney, well, where his kidney use to be. Ha! Ha! Ha!

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Vince McMahon: No one appreciates Sable more than Dok Hendrix.

Jerry Lawler: I do.

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Vince McMahon: Jesse James can wrestle every bit as good as he can sing.

Jerry Lawler: Then he won't win many matches.

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Omaha Nebraska is mentioned.

Jerry Lawler: Is that the heartland of America?

Jim Ross: Yes it is King.

Jerry Lawler: Do you want to know why it's the heartland of America? Because there is no brain.

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Bret Hart.

Vince McMahon: You are such a hypocrite.

Jerry Lawler: What?

Vince McMahon: You are a hypocrite. After all those things you have said about him, after all those things you said about his parents.

Jerry Lawler: I never said anything that was not true, so I said his parents are a little old. But it is true. Just because Stu was the first maid on the Noah's Ark and Helen knew Big Bird when he was Tweedy. Bret knows they're old.

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The Undertaker's scar.

Jerry Lawler: It is like a bullseye painted on his head.

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Henry Godwinn sufferend a broken neck.

Jerry Lawler: He's too stupid to know he's hurt.

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Sunny modeling a shirt.

Jerry Lawler: I don't know about the shipping, but I would like to pay for the handling.

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Jerry Lawler: These people in Omaha hate anyone with real teeth.

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Lawler is commenting on Ken Shammrock challenging Mike Tyson

Jerry Lawler: Hey Shammrock, why don't you go out and challenge George Foreman. He will take on a nobody like you.

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Rockabilly with a sleeper hold on Ahmed Johnson.

Jim Ross: That is a good strategy by Rockabilly to cut off that flow of that blood to the brain and all of a sudden Ahmed is unconsicous.

Jerry Lawler: What brain?

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The camera was focused on the French announce team.

Jerry Lawler: Hey, do you speak French? Palivou fried eggs?

Jim Ross: No, I can barely speak English.

Jerry Lawler: You got that right.

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Talk about Chyna.

Jerry Lawler: Yeah! Nice chin too. Jay Leno, eat you heart out.

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Chyna lifted Flash Funk and dropped him on the top rope.

Jerry Lawler: I want to see if Chyna can lift you up like that Ross.

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Ken Shamrock's Zone.

Jerry Lawler: Yeah! You're going to be in the Twilight Zone. That is where Vader is going to knock you in.

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Jerry Lawler: Ahmed Johnson has the IQ of 2 and it takes 3 just to grunt.

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Jerry Lawler: Just ask Clarence Mason. He says, "A small question for a small fee."

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Jerry Lawler: The people in Richland have two color necks. Light red and dark red.

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A fan had a sign that said "Austin for president"

Jerry Lawler: If he was president, the countries bird would be the middle finger.

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Jerry Lawler: I would beat you up Ross, but I have a thing against cruelty to animals.

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Ahmed Johnson at the KOTR.

Jerry Lawler: Can you imagine that Ross, King Ahmed Johnson? How would the crown fit on his head, it would probably slip right off. His head looks like a Milk Dud.

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Jerry Lawler: Ahmed Johnson came from a neighborhood where the most common words heard was, "You have the right to remain silent."

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Jerry Lawler: Hey Finkle, last time I saw something like you, I flushed it. Hey, why don't you go back and borrow one of McMahon's toupees.

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Jerry Lawler: Speaking of Kathy Lee, Did you hear about Frank Gifford? He got caught having an affair with a flight attendant. Hey Ross, isn't your wife a flight attendant?

Jim Ross: Oh yeah King, you think that is really funny don't you?

Jerry Lawler:Yeah!

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Jerry questionioning people from Alabama.

Jerry Lawler: I got a tough one for you. If your mom and dad got a divorce, would they still be brother and sister? Ha, Ha! That's a tough one, isn't it?

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Jerry is commenting on Bob Holly's racing abilities .

Jerry Lawler: He kept going to the pit stop to ask for directions.

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Jerry Lawler: Did you know that if you buy a car in Mobile, Alabama, it has a warning label on the mirror that says "Objects in the mirror are dumber than they seem".

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Jerry on Shawn Michaels.

Jerry Lawler: He is the kind of man who would throw both ends of a rope to a drowning man.

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Jerry Lawler: Mankind is two fries short of a happy meal.

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Goldust said that Marlena and Dakota are his life.

Jerry Lawler: Then you need to get a life.

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Jerry Lawler: Jake Roberts had a problem and he drank it.

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Jerry Lawler: You know when most people get drunk, they see snakes. Well when snakes get drunk, they see Jake Roberts.

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Lawler was in a swimming pool at the SummerSlam Bikini Beach Blast-Off

Jerry Lawler: If this pool were filled with beer, you know Jake "The Snake" Roberts would be in it.

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McMAHON: King, do you wear that crown all the time?

LAWLER: Do you wear that toupee all the time?

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Jerry Lawler: You can take one look at Mark Henry and see that if he won a gold medal, he'd just take it and have it bronzed.

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Jerry Lawler: Mankind's house is so small, he needs to go outside to eat a large pizza.

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Mankind

Jerry Lawler: When you were born and your mom saw your face and your rear end, she said, Oh! siamesse Twins! Ha! Ha! Ha!

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Jerry Lawler: Paul E. Dangerously reminds me of Marv Albert, they both bite.

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ZURÜCK